After a couple months of waiting and waiting for SPIAR to take off on all eBook retailers, I finally let it go. I have received two five star reviews on Amazon, but nothing anywhere else. I lowered the price of the novel last week and still have yet to see an increase in sales. At all. Everyone that has read the book sings my praises, but I don’t see an influx of support. I realize that I am an unknown independent author, but holy hell.
I believe that the past few months have been due to my sense of fear ever since I clicked the “Publish” button on Smashwords and Amazon Kindle Direct. I had a few people tell me that this is my calling, that I should definitely be doing this for a living. Despite all the positive pushing, there are hardly any results. Again, I understand that I am an unknown independent author, but I thought that I would sell at least a few copies every few days.
Within the first few days, SPIAR sold a handful of copies. I was ecstatic, my dream was coming true! Everyone that reads my novel is astounded and loves it! I am finally on the road to success. Or so I thought. I became obsessed with checking for reviews and feedback. A past co-worker and a nice young woman who agreed to do a review swap provided it. I have seen no other reviews or anything since. No other copies have sold since the first week I published.
The past few months have been spent, for the most part, second guessing myself. Is everyone just being nice to me about this? Am I really not that great of a writer? What have I done wrong or what have I messed up? I am often asked at work how the book is doing, and it feels like they are cracking a joke. A stab of the proverbial knife to my stomach, if you will.
But, no. I know that I can write. I’ve been told this ever since I was thirteen. Teachers would save my reports or short stories for last because they genuinely enjoyed reading them. When I was that young, I wasn’t really paying attention to their comments. It wasn’t until high school that I seriously noticed my so called talent. It became a hobby, and I even have an unfinished novel sitting in my desk drawer from those days. Maybe it will resurface, maybe not.
When I have the chance to write, I have noticed that I am a happier person. Colleagues at work have noticed this as well. With a wife, two amazing children, and a military lifestyle, keeping up with my reading and writing is near impossible. Perhaps when the kids get a little bit older, I will be able to dig deep and slew words around like a pro. A guy can dream, right?
Anyway, for those of you that care, I have officially started the sequel to SPIAR. All 150 words of it, haha. I felt a rush of inspiration when I acquired my new laptop computer, and just started typing for about sixty seconds. Regardless of how little progress I have made since the publication of SPIAR, another is on the way. I promise that this one is going to be bigger and badder than the last and I can’t wait to try and knock your socks clear off your feet.
Easy days and blissful nights,
V. E. Bystry
V. E. Bystry 